I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
