piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
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