So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I think your dad took our porno
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize