she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
im about as happy as oj after his trial
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
