Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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