she looked like the bat from fern gully.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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