does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
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