My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize