yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
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