Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
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