I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
Randomize
