If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Randomize
