Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
The power of my boobs compel you
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
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