So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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