Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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