Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
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