: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Only a mothe r could love this liver
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
