You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
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