I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
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