I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
