WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Randomize
