my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
