There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
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