Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Randomize