Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
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