Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
Randomize
