Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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