I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize