And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
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