My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
