holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I need water and some morals
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
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