I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
