laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
