That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Randomize
