Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Randomize
