it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Randomize
