You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize
