Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Randomize