so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
