Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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