I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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