Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I still have a little drunk in my system
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize
