nut hugger
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Randomize
