fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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