I wish I only lived at night.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Randomize
