I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
