Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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