I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
