I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
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