I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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