I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize