cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
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